My Life on Cards

(Pretentious, no?)

[In 1995 I started to take notes on file cards for a possible autobiography. Here they are.]

First Grade 69-70

I cried on my first day at school. I'd never been left alone before. I hadn’t gone to kindergarten. Mrs. Roberts was the teacher, but it was Mrs. Dalman, one of the kindest, ugliest women I've ever met who comforted me, calmed me down. I'm grateful to her still.

Mrs. Roberts. D'Layne Langlenais. Keith Farrel. Brian Meuth. Byron Zip. Dorothy. Adam Patterson.

I remember when Adam read the "Tip" books, he said "Teep, Teep. Run, Teep, run." I remember Daniel Handy showing me a magazine that had the new cars for '70 in it.

It was a few (2?) weeks before the end of school. I had finished my whole workbook ahead of schedule; I always did extra work. I turned it in to Mrs. R. with great satisfaction; workbook time would now be free time. It was the afternoon and very sleepy. Lots of people had their heads down on their desks. End of school/end of day feeling very great (as in big).

Second Grade 70-71

Most people learned how to tie their shoes in kindergarten. I hadn't gone, didn't know. Mrs. Nowotney made it her special project to teach me. She even put up a Peanuts poster with Linus: "Happiness is knowing how to tie your own shoes." It worked. I always was a sucker for Linus.

Nobody checked books from the room library. I noticed cards in the back and asked Mrs. Nowotney if I could, then did. Checked out a book about a Sea Captain and his little boat, the "Tidly-Idly", who put a bandage on a whale's tail, then all the other whales wanted one. Books on water drops and rain.

A recruiter from the Girl Scouts came and made a speech, then handed a pile of forms to be passed back, each girl in the row to keep one. Since it was for girls, I wasn't listening and passed back automatically, keeping one by habit. When the girl at the back didn't get one, and people realized what had happened, everyone laughed.

Third Grade 71-72

Mrs. Davenport put strips of blue tape on the desks. If you misbehaved the tape was removed; if you were especially good, you got a gold star. At the end of the year if you still had your tape, you got a quarter and an extra nickel for each star. I lost mine not for being bad but for unconsciously kicking my desk.

At the back of the room behind the bookshelves there was a little alcove where the games were kept. A boy named Gabriel was the only other one who liked to play checkers so I usually wound up playing with him at break time, though I don't think he really liked me.

Mrs. D. had one of the best room libraries in the whole school. Big well-illustrated books like Disney's "The Wind in the Willows", a big anthology of Uncle Wiggly tales, illustrated anthologies of cat and animal stories.

Fourth Grade 72-73

Mrs. Bratton had a pretty good room library. I read The Nip and Tuck War; George, a bespectacled rabbit; the story of a half mouse/half man in the aftermath of the Cinderella tale [Cinders]. Some books I got at the time were 101 Dalmatians, Journey to the Center of the Earth, Around the World in Eighty Days, and The Three Musketeers. Mrs. B. read us James and the Giant Peach.

This was the year Susan was born. I kind of had a crush on Mrs. Bratton because she was new. She had round blonde hair and black horn-rim glasses. When discussing Mom's expectancy, I casually remarked, "Mrs. Bratton had a baby."

I was always fidgeting. One time during a film strip I was rolling the cord to the projector under my shoe. It passed right by my desk. Suddenly there was a pop, and the projector blew out. The cord had frayed. Luckily it was in the dark, so no one knew it was me, but I felt guilty anyway.

Jerry Williams had the freckliest face and the greatest collection of comic books I'd ever seen. He showed me the first MAD magazine I ever remember seeing and issue #1 of a comic called "The Demon" that was interesting. It had Merlin and Morgan le Fay in it.

Fourth Grade 73-74

Mrs. Harris' cat had kittens and I got one. I named her Rosemary, after the girl in Carbonel. She was, I think, a tortoiseshell-type cat, with green eyes.

Mrs. Harris had a statuette of a squirrel or a chipmunk on her desk called "Chippy". It was kind of a sporting tradition to take it and hide it somewhere during lunchtime. Then she had to find it. Once it turned up wrapped in rubber bands.

Mrs. Harris read us Misty of Chincoteague. No-one read much of her room library, but I remember I read Mrs. Pickerel and Miss Pickett books in her class. Miss Pickett was a cheap Mary Poppins clone.

McQueeney 5th-6th Grade: The older grades played out front on breaks. There was a concrete ledge along the wall that was fun to balance along. It was boring and you couldn't go to the back where the playground was unless you played sports and you couldn't mingle with the smaller kids.

McQueeney Library: The Visitors from Oz. Donald Duck Goes to South America. Sea-Monsters. Werewolves. Uncle Wiggly. Thornton Burgess/The Adventures of Unc' Billy Possum. Dudley the Dragon [Thaddeus Jones and the Dragon]. The Lollypop Dragon. Aquarium with Creature from the Black Lagoon (or was that the city library?). Mrs. Reese.

Sixth Grade 74-75: A. J. Briesemeister Middle School was the great divide. Kids you'd been together with for five years were dispersed among hundreds. Kids you never knew were suddenly cheek by jowl with you. There were lockers and showers and changing classes ten times a day. All rather hellish.

Omi's House: In the hall there was a little niche for the telephone. In her bedroom was a night-light of a bouquet of flowers in a white wicker frame; in the middle of each flower was a little red light bulb like a Christmas light. Her Chinese jasmine bushes and the tunnels within them. 

Uncle Marvin's: The sheep. The barn. The dogs under the porch. The boxes of toys: teddy bears, the monkey, little animals, etc. The crucifix on the wall, the Last Supper, Guardian Angel. The Schmidt's. Bottle cap collecting in the driveway.

Uncle Monroe's: Big Tex sodas in the outdoor garage fridge. The vise. Deer heads in the living room. Swings, trampoline, the old witch's cauldron. Mo-mots. Pecan trees. SHS in the background. The side porch where you counted cars. The cactus Mike tripped over. Crawling under the table while they played cards.

Uncle David's: The barn. The horses. The old trough. Chickens everywhere. The window seat. The scary bathroom. Hand drawn poster "The Devil Made Me Do It". Toys and little animals. The board over the septic tank.

Nanny's Old House: Bamboo stand. Open garage. Old Santa sign. Big wooden spoon and fork. Bar with purple stools. Big S-shaped chair. Poodles. Part of the house rented out that we never went into.

1995: Nov. 28. A beautiful day weatherwise; at night it dropped to 34 degrees. Read Popism by Andy Warhol and Pat Hackett. Worked on the Great Garage Cleanup [never accomplished] with John. Watched Poirot and Marple. Read Andy Warhol bio by Bockris. Started these cards. Had talk with John about life and goals. Nov. 29 John made new recordings of a bunch of old tapes and played them for us. From internal evidence they date from before Susan's birth and include the infamous "Racquel Welch pillow" and "I don't want to change diapers!" Nov. 30 More old tapes, Rich Little show, "Paparelli's Pizza Man." Ate the last butterscotch from Kenny and Kaye's wedding.

[I add a few in 2023. The old green wooden folding table in the back bedroom, and Mom periodically painting it. Pop having to dock the poodle puppies’ tails on the back porch step; his whetstone and pocket knife. The webby, faded ‘dish washing rags’ that always hung on the kitchen sink, and the old radio in the window that we listened to while we washed. And, once again, the Mexican pottery lamps with marbles.]

 I couldn't imagine in 1995 how many of those books I would be able to track down and own. The internet (as far as it existed) was something other people used. It's a pure coincidence that I started those cards exactly 28 years ago. Some of those memories I wouldn't remember today if I hadn't written them down.