2020 Diary: The Stub-End of October

10/29/2020: So up about 5 AM, prayers, Bible. Much worrying over stuff to little avail. At 9 AM made ramen and eggs. Got Medicaid set up at 10 AM without any trouble. At noon Andy brought in a letter and it was my Medicaid card. Ramen for lunch. Worry worry worry about debit card. At 1:30 PM help Kameron with his measuring. At 4 PM made supper (chili-corn-pasta). At 7 PM prayed rosary and 7:30 PM went in to clean up and talked to Susan and she convinced me to call Amy and by 8:30 PM the card was set up. Now I just need to go and use it. Then I need to talk to SSI about where to send my payments.

 

10/30/2020: Up about 6:30 AM, prayers, Bible. Left house about 7:50 AM and went to Dollar Genral to inaugurate debit card. Got about $10 worth of stuff, back at 9 AM. Made ramen and eggs. At 10 AM called SS, found that I had apparently already had requested an express card to receive my payments to. Went out to the mail and there it was, along with a check for November. So that worry is over, except that I might want to transfer that to the RBFCU. But that is a concern for another month. Spent the rest of the day with it off my mind, watching ‘Sleepy Hollow’, reading Kipling, playing DQ8. At 2:30 PM I started frying taters, at 4 PM made fish and fed pets, at 5 PM had supper and continued frying taters until almost 7 PM. Kameron came out, and we finished watching ‘Hellboy’ until almost 9 PM. Went in, washed up, got a jug of water, prayed rosary, and hit the hay.

 

10/31/2020: Halloween, and the last day of October. And what a month it has been. It seems to have both dragged along and flown by, full of incident and anxious waiting between incidents, and small rejoicings.

Up about 6:20 AM. Prayers and Bible. Caught up diary, morning straightening. Coldish. I think I’ll take a shower before dressing and breakfast.

And so I did, having ramen for breakfast. Naught much in the forenoon, but a little after 12 I went in and got a pot and a can-opener and made a Taste of Thanksgiving for lunch. Cleaned up the back yard a bit at the same time Andy leaf-blew around the pool. At 4 PM they brought me four corndogs (it was 50 cent corn dog day at Sonic). At 5 PM I watched the Great Pumpkin DVD. Rosary about 7 PM and sent Kris Jerome “Halloween in Gothenberg” as a holiday remembrance. It’s now 7:44 PM, and something (not a cat) is screeching something awful on the left-hand side (not over the stream) and making the dogs barky. Posted some of ‘What Happened’ on NOT.

E-mail to John earlier: So Halloween 2020 is upon us, with a full moon (I think the first full moon on Halloween since the 40's), cool weather, and on a Saturday, all of which should make a perfect storm for the holiday, if it weren't for this dashed plague! AND no Great Pumpkin on network television for the first time in decades? What is the world coming to ...? Not that it matters to me, since I have my own DVD, and am way past trick-or-treating. But still. There is a fitness and a long-standing custom to these things.

To which he replied: For certain! This should have been a Halloween for the books! As it is, it is a sad contrast to a better time. On a short break, working tomorrow too, so a long slog to go until I can feel very optimistic about life a little.  Have a good Halloween, or the best one possible: we are still alive and kicking, eh?

Bed about 9 PM.

 

Diary 2020: October 15 -21

2020 Diary

10/15/2020: Up about 4:10 AM. Prayers, Bible. Started clearing out cabinets in anticipation of a new plan: if I live long enough, to start stockpiling long-lasting staples like Spam and ramen, so I’ll always have something to nibble on. The cleaning entailed moving stuff around and compacting a few things without making the house seem crowded again. I think it succeeded pretty well. The cabinets under the bookshelves in the kitchen are now empty, as well as two shelves in the cabinet over the microwave. Bring on the food! [This plan never happened.] It’s now 5:41 AM. Maybe I’ll lay down again and see if I can sleep a little more.

Laid down for not quite an hour, then up again. Put all the Morg materials together in anticipation of stitching them into a single document. Ramen and eggs at 9 AM, then reading (and finishing up) “The Light That Failed” by 11 AM. In between the dr.’s office called, and I explained my financial situation, so no appointment just yet. It doesn’t break my heart. Started taking my medicine again.

Said Rosary at 12:30 PM, then went in and got leftover rice/broccoli/mushrooms. Dithered and dallied reading Kipling, playing DQ8, and trying to nap until 4 PM, when I went in, fed pets, made spaghetti and salad, then came back, and ate supper. Still no word from the boys, and I grow more and more obsessed with the idea of cleaning and cataloging the ‘attic’. Will go in at 8 PM to clean up. Bed about 10 PM.

 

10/16/2020: Up about 5 AM. Prayers, Bible. It had got cooler overnight. Started working on gathering images and sorting through the comic books, to make posts on NOT for representative samples, as it would be too tedious to go through them all. [Which I have since done.] Went in at 9 AM for ramen/eggs/bread, then again about 10 AM for ramen/bread. The day was cool and overcast, never more than 71 degrees, and breezy, perfect weather. House open all day.

Posted the comics in four sections. In the interstices of the day read Kipling and played DQ8. At 2:30 PM started frying potatoes, which was simpler and easier with the house set up like it is now. Also made corn on the cob for S&A, then the fish (an extra piece today, hurray!). Cleaned up at 7:30 PM. Watched Andy Griffith Show, then Gomer Pyle, then Green Acres. Rosary a little after 9 PM, then bed at 9:30 PM.

 

10/17/2020: Despite my best efforts, I knew I was awake at 3:50 AM, so got up and caught up Diary. What shall I do today? I am almost at the end of nooks to clean out and catalogue. Of course, I have tons of computer files I could rearrange. Yesterday’s panicked hunt for Eekus [the comic from Ghost Manor] proves that. I think yearningly of the attic bins and wish I had a spry assistant to help me, if only for a few hours. I’ve started to feel little zings on the right side of my skull. Sinuses, or what? Well, on to prayers and Bible.

After my devotions, I did start on my files and folders, and a more involved and interesting task there is not. There are folders within folders within folders and getting everything straightened out and filed correctly looks to be a formidable task. I ate a ramen for breakfast, took my medicine, and went to work. About 7 AM I began to feel sleepy again, so laid down a bit and slept until 9:20 AM. Weather outside is cool, overcast, and a little drippy, but it’s hard to tell if that’s rain or just condensation. Back to the files.

Went in at 12:20 PM to get eggs and ramen. Worked on Files. Stopped at 2 PM. Playing a little DQ8. Went back to Files, when Susan and Kaitlyn showed up at about 4 PM, needing my keys to get in the house. Visited a bit. Got bananas about 5:30 PM. Watched “A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing” on EWTN, then “A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing II: The Gender Agenda” until 11 PM. Rosary. I have so far to go with the Files, and it is infinitely engaging, but I think I must go to bed soon. OK, I stopped about 1 AM. Time to wind down to bed. But I was up playing until 3 AM.

 

10/18/2020: Exactly 2 weeks of October left. Up at 6:40 AM. Prayers, shower, then Bible. On to YouTube Mass.

Afterwards had pretzels pounded in the mortar so I could take my medicine; polished off the tea. Worked on the Files. About 9 AM did a revolution (only 1; the old knee is painful). Went in at 12:30 PM and got 1 ramen. Got a jug of water. Did another revolution. Filling in this time with the Files and Kipling and DQ8. Rosary from 5:10 PM to 5:30 PM, then went out for another revolution, just in time to talk to S&A. Posted a couple items on NOT, but the Files are what engaging me. Watched an episode of Duck Tales [the new iteration] at 6 PM. Got 2 ramen for supper. Mostly worked on Files. Finishing a big one at 11:30 or so, then read Kipling and dropped off at when?

 

10/19/2020: Awake again at 2:30 AM. Made some posts on NOT an FB, then tried to sleep again. Up definitely about 6 AM, head full of plans. Prayers, Bible, and moving the DVDs off the shelves. Moved couch. I’m setting up a temporary arrangement in preparation for cleaning out the attic. I expect to live with it, maybe until the weekend. Dressed and went to go vote at 7 AM, getting it out of the way. Already about 7 or 8 people there. Covid-19 procedures in place, with social distancing and cotton swabs to use on the touch screens. Home by 7:24 AM, civic duty done, and put my new ‘I Voted’ sticker on my Kindle, over the old one. Stripped my shirt and sanitized my hands already outside. Continue with my arranging and normal Monday procedures. Went in at 9 AM, started my wash, and boiled eggs and made egg salad, making my ramen as I did so. Came in at 10 AM, watched a little Ichabod and Mr. Toad, e-mailed John, changed my wash, then laid down at about 11 AM, feeling pretty tired. Susan and Andy came over at 11:40 AM, excitedly bearing two checks from SSI, one for $2349 (for the amount due since my claim in May) and another for $261 (for part of the month?). My happiness is somewhat muted by being tired, and the thought of all that must now be done to curate that money. The cosmic ballet … continues. Good part is Andy (seeing my rearrangements) has agreed to help me get the bins out of the attic.

About 12:30 PM I go in and make cucumber salad. Spend much of the afternoon thinking about how to proceed, reading the materials, and pondering. John calls me about 3 PM, and we discuss it, and what Amy thinks. She knows much about banking, and her advice carries weight. Go in and start cooking at 4 PM (fish patties and couscous) and come back a little before 5 PM. A little after 6 PM Kameron comes in and at his request I play some Kingdom Hearts, which I have grown rusty at. I go in about 7:30 PM to wash up, and Susan further discusses my situation, proposing that I attach either John or herself to the account, to act for me in an emergency; I believe this is wise. About 8 PM I feel overcome with weariness and plug in the AC; it has grown warm and muggy. I drop off asleep. Awake at 9:30 PM, pray Rosary, and caught up diary. The guest house looks strange with the desk and DVDs out from under the attic. I don’t feel as elated as I thought I would with finally getting some benefits, though I am grateful. I seem mostly to be thinking about what I still need to do. Perhaps when I get it all settled and first taste the groceries that I buy I will be more celebratory. It’s now only 10 PM, and it feels like one of the longer days of my life, starting with voting (and how far away that seems now!) and full of thinking and facing the future.

 

10/20/2020: Wow. Just looked back and saw I was so distracted I completely skipped writing up today. The usual stuff happened, except that time crawled very slowly.  Mostly worried and planned about how to set up bank account and going back and forth about that. Worked on Files (finishing a big one) and playing DQ8 and helped Kam with his homework (he has to finish up that Puzzle Piece assignment). The day ended up with Amy starting to pen up an account for me at RFBCU.

 

10/21/2020: Woke up about 4 AM from a dream, wrote it up, then prayers and Bible. More Files. At 9 AM went in for ramen, and then leftover cabbage. About 10 AM hear from Amy she needs a scan of my SS card, so when Susan comes home from lunch, I arrange that. About 1 AM I go in for leftover sausage. Kam’s continued homework hangs in the air. Here it’s almost 3 PM, and I’m still waiting for the scans; probably mail delay, and not Susan’s fault.  E-mail to John:

“I have seldom known two days to pass so slowly. Ever since I got the good news, time has seemed to crawl along, I suppose partly because of anticipation, and partly because occupied with concern over things I need to do. It seems that 'real life' has asserted itself again, as opposed to those occupations I used to fill my time with. 

“Not that I've stopped everything. The great clean-up continues in a minor way, as I also await Andy helping me get the bins down, as he has promised. That will probably be on the weekend; I also anticipate it impatiently.  I continue to work on the Files and draw closer to completing work on them. I want to be done with that.  When all is said and done, I hope to able to settle into a more comfortable routine heading into the holidays. 

“But for four days now (including the weekend, which I took as a break) I have done no writing work, not even stitching the Morg materials together, as I had planned. I intend to make a concerted effort today to pick things up again.

"Also of course I'm affected by Babellian pessimism; every time something positive happens, I expect the world to slap back hard, or at least to take something away in return or it not to be as wonderful as I had hoped.  They had only just started to pay me to take care of Mom for maybe a year when she suddenly passed away. Still, even though it is the fatal month of October in the middle of a plague year, I dare to be cautiously optimistic."

Making sauerkraut, sausage, and dumplings for supper. Did Rosary about 2 PM, I guess. Helped Kam with his homework at 3 PM, Susan finally sent a scan of my social about 3:40 PM that I sent on to Amy, made supper at 4 PM and finished at 5 PM. The dumplings turned out pretty good. Files. Kam came out at 9 PM and we spent until 11 PM finishing up his SMART project. Now I’m ready to wind down.

NOTES

So, it’s been five years, and I feel ready for another look in the Attic. Such a task seems even more problematic now.  If I do somehow manage it, I’m going to have to make a more detailed catalog of the bins so I can satisfy my forgetful mind. Out of sight? Out of mind! And sometimes it drives me out of my mind.

Here is the scanty list I eventually made. I’m sure more ‘stuff’ has been added since. What interests me most is that Medium Blue Bin with Mediocre Action Figures. I’m sure there’s some stuff I would now feel justified in tossing.

Attic List

Square Blue Bin: Foot massager, sunglasses, blood pressure machine, blood sugar machines, old PS2, old CD player, other junk.

Black Bin: Weebles Tree House, King Kong bank.

Black Bin: Uninteresting toys (mostly plastic ‘set building stuff’.)

Green Bin: Simpsons sets, old computer keyboard, computer mouse.

Grey File Case: Old tattered comics, not great, but memories I find hard to throw away.

Dark Blue Bin: LOTR set-builders from Kenny (for that smaller format).

Medium Blue Bin: Mediocre action figures, bendies, and so on. Still, some good things.

Light Blue Bin: Mediocre old toys from Loop Drive, not great, but memories.

The Old Hoppy Horse.

2020 Diary: October Begins

10/1/2020: First day of October. Up about 5 PM. Prayers, Bible, then went on to implement that scheme of moving stuff between the drawers. Got all the action figures into the “bus” dresser and moved the Christmas figurines back behind the “bed” dresser. Strange to see the action figures and handle them; it’s been a while. Now 6:15 AM and on to my regular business.

Just a note. Yesterday and today, I’ve been wearing the old dragon T-shirts, and where before they were a bit of a squeeze, now they hang well enough.

So, I played DQ8 until I felt sleepy and laid down for a nap; the weather was perfect for it. I woke up at 1 PM when Kam called me to make him toast. That was good timing. There was a new Ignatius Press catalog arrived. I went in and made my lunch ramen. Looking at Facebook I saw that someone in Seguin had actually won the TX Lotto. Figures. The moment I lack a dollar to play, someone wins it, and someone from Seguin, at that. Probably they would have won whether I played or not, but at least I would have been in the game, as it were, and it wouldn’t have stung so much. Made more Wish List documents to help me organize the Main Wish List, so I don’t have to hunt and peck so much.

At 2:30 PM I did my King Korm page for the day, then a rosary at 3 PM. At 4 PM went in, fed pets, and started supper. Came back home at 5 PM, ate chili. About 5:30 PM Kam comes in to have me cut down large index cards into regular index cards, then stays in to finish his homework. Just after he leaves (about 7:30 PM) Andy comes in and changes that bulb for me, that blew out way long ago on Jan. 1^, which I wanted changed because Kameron would be doing his project in here. Posted 3 new Tolkien-related books for the Wish List. Prepared wish list post for tomorrow. Wrote my page on American Prometheus by about 10:10 PM. Nothing really to do until I hit the hay. Which I did about 11 PM.

 

10/2/2020: Up at 5 AM. Prayers and Bible. Posted apologetics Wish List items, then the last CSL books, then teachers and loved ones of CSL books on NOT. Then I got out the end table for Kam to work on, dusted, and swept. While dusting I noticed the little tin under the computer ‘antenna’, and on a growing realization, opened it. There were the missing memory cards for the PS2. I can now access all my old games. Neat! Shaved. Now 7 AM. Gathered Kid Lit pictures, took garbage out, then did my page of KK. Now 8 AM. By 8:30 AM I had finished my page of AP. Got my ramen and eggs at 9 AM. Found out my memory cards aren’t being accepted by the machine. Perhaps they are too old. Made more mini-lists and gathered covers. Did more straightening up, including sweeping the kitchen porch and wrangling the dog toys back into a pile. Jade almost caught a squirrel running around under a tree. It’s now 10:40 AM.

Well, Kameron came out at about 11 AM and waited about half an hour until his teacher called him. From that time until almost 2:30 PM he spent working on the project; almost an hour of that time was spent looking for something he could shellac onto his wood. After that it went pretty quickly. I had multiples of a Christmas card, and he used the picture of Santa. Almost immediately after that I had to start frying taters. I thank God I got all MY stuff out of the way already. I am exhausted. Trying to herd Kameron to do what he ought to is emotionally draining. So I finished and ate my supper at 5 PM. Said my rosary about 6:10 PM. Zonked out until 8:15 PM then went in and washed up. My goodness, my legs hurt.

 Went back and looked through all of NOT, and that took me quite a while. I don’t know, looking over the covers of what was, what is, and what yet may be gives me a strange thrill that just looking at the spines on shelves do not. Finished and to bed a little before midnight.

 

10/3/2020: Awake at 4 AM, then up at 4:20 AM when it became obvious that I wouldn’t sleep anymore. Prayers and Bible, then went straight into blogging. It’s now 6:30 AM, and I plan to continue until 7 AM, when I will make ramen.

Made and ate ramen and continued posting on NOT until 10:13 AM. Now I feel like I could sleep a bit again. Gathered covers for HPLovecraft, then lay down on the couch.

Slept until a little before noon. Ready to take up NOT again. Also, filled with the desire to clean out the attic. Worked on NOT, not only making more posts, but preparing lists and gathering covers. About 8 PM Andy came out and asked me to make some dip-dips, so I did. Came back out and explored a new book company, Forgotten Books, reprints of obscure volumes, very fascinating. Then played a bit of DQ8, then said my rosary at 9:30 PM, then wrote my page on KK, and now it’s 10:15 PM, and I shall try to write on AP now, even though I’m plagued with a desire for more re-arranging.

Done writing and listing at 11 AM. Time to settle down.

 

10/4/2020: Up about 5 AM, prayers and Bible, then put books from old World Book shelf onto the shelf by the lamp and other ‘rearranging’. My legs hurting and my ears ringing. Now almost 6 AM; time for YouTube mass.

Afterwards I blogged on NOT. Wrote on King Korm. Rearranged the drawers, sorting out the Xeroxes, clippings, maps, pamphlets, etc. Prayed the rosary. Swept under the fridge. It’s now almost 10:30 AM.

“Like many other things, he loved Summer most when it was dying.”

I went in a little after noon to get a ramen. Susan seemed a bit annoyed to see me. She and Andy worked on the yard most of the afternoon. I blogged, and rearranged, and cleaned. Switched the batteries between my clickers and changed the channel at last for the evening Fox animated shows. When I went in at 6:45 PM to get another ramen I also got some mushrooms she was going to throw away.

So watched some of the Fox animation (for what it was worth) [worth even less now], then spent the rest of the evening after 9 PM hunting first Chesterton covers, then (obsessively) covers for all the Wish List Items, finishing a little after 1 AM. The room looks and feels different, airier somehow, since my new arrangements. Time to try to sleep.

 

10/5/2020: Up at 6 AM, prayers and Bible, and went right into posting on NOT. At 9 AM started the wash, boiled eggs, made egg salad, and my breakfast ramen. Went right on posting on and off all day, until about 10 PM. About noon made cucumber salad. Went in at 4 PM to take care of pets and start supper; left at a little before 5 PM. Rosary about 6:30 PM. Didn’t have to go in to wash dishes; no couscous to cook today. But also, none to eat. Just had 2 more ramen and cucumber salad. Went through Chesterton, Sayers, Blaylock, and Powers, among others. Rounding the bend toward Tolkien. Considering doing posters and magazines after I’m done with books. ‘Wot larks!’ Did my page of KK about 10 PM; think I’ll just do 2 of AP tomorrow, maybe. We’ll see if my OCD will let me. My e-mails to John today:

“If my calculations are correct, you're out of Purgatory [work] at the moment and perhaps have decompressed enough to enjoy a day of 'regular life'. The weather is certainly nice enough.

I was able to keep up my 2 pages a day over the weekend. I'm really starting to be able to get into "King Korm" again. "American Prometheus" continues to stymie me, although I progress.

I'm also getting into the swing of "Niche of Time", putting out multiple posts a day. Sometimes it is hard to find the exact copy of a cover that I have; there were a couple of dozen for GKC's "Orthodoxy" alone, and none of them seemed to be mine! I was able to track it down at last, though. So far, the only one that has completely eluded me has been Dorothy L. Sayers' "The Mind of the Maker". An abundance of covers, just not mine. Sometimes I really miss having a scanner! But I found one close enough and made a note of it. I can see the end in sight. Today I am on Tim Powers and James P. Blaylock; when I am done with them that only leaves a couple of shelves worth of various and then Tolkien, whom I have saved for last. I hope to be done with my task before the end of October, this fatal month. And whither then? I cannot say. Perhaps loading my favorite music videos from YouTube. It is, after all, a celebration of my enthusiasms.

I realize (rather late now) that I should put a rating on the Items from the Wish List, indicating how much I desire them, from 'nice to have' to 'must have eet' to 'way too expensive to ever get', and probably some grades in between, like, 'I'd like to try that'. As I go along through all the books, I realize or remember new things I would 'wish' for, and new things come along at a fairly regular rate.

There are now rumors that there might be NUDITY in the new Middle Earth Second Age show. Please God that will never happen; it will indicate that the franchise has ran away from the creator. [Luckily that never happened]”

“With a little extra search, I WAS able to find a cover for my copy of "The Mind of the Maker". A little blurry, true, but quite recognizable.

With the arranging I've been doing, the house looks a bit airier than it did. I think that's because a) things are going a little taller, with the spice rack/display cabinet up on top of the shadowbox and my framed old drawing of Mom on top of the mirror under the attic door, b) not cramping the shelving so much, and c) Andy replacing that light bulb that's been blown out since New Year's.  And being able to have the house open again. All of which means nothing to anybody but me, of course, but I do feel somewhat easier.  And I'm having a blast further refining my organization.

It brings up tons of old memories and feelings too. I was rearranging the contents of a drawer into clippings, Xeroxes, and printed material, and my mind was just flooded with old enthusiasms and associations. Museum pamphlets and college speakers, Mom's old pregnancy care brochures, cut-out comic strips, the cardboard lid of the Enterprise model and the Indiana Jones fruit cart illustrated assembly instructions - weird, useless stuff I can't think about getting rid of. 

Anyway, getting everything into order is just one of those autumnal impulses, I guess, as is nostalgia. Almost a compulsion. I made about 12 new posts today! If only I could figure out some way to make it pay or be of some use.”

I did squeeze my page of AP (and one more blog post) in just before midnight, and hopped into bed right at 12 AM.

 

10/6/2020: Woke up exactly at 6 AM (after the usual ups and downs of the night). Prayers and Bible, and now at 6:25 AM ready to resume NOT (my new preferred abbreviation for ‘Niche of Time’). Except for breaks for breakfast and lunch I pretty much charged hard at finding covers and making posts. A little before 2 PM John called, and we talked for about fifty minutes about books and October and times being what they were. Now almost 3:50 PM and making supper looms. Oh. The weather was kind of overcast and foggy this morning, with a bunch of – seagulls? – crying out. Now it’s clearer. I think I can squeeze some more NOT business in before I have to start cooking. Kind of a persistent wheezing cough plaguing me. I hope it’s mold or something.

I made supper (fish cakes and couscous), and Kameron some sandwiches, then came back about 5 PM. Made my ramen and couscous. Some DQ8. Rosary about 6:30 PM, then went in a little after 8 PM to clean up. Afterward made a note in preparation to start Tolkien books, then did some sweeping up of a few books for NOT. Wrote my pages by 11:10 PM. Nothing to do now but meander around until bed. Played a bit of DQ8 to unwind (I think I’m finally getting a little full of it) then hit the hay a little after midnight.

 

10/7/2020: Up at 5 AM, after the usual intermittent night, complicated by wheeziness and phlegm (seasonal allergies exacerbated by cool air?). Prayers, Bible. Ready to start Tolkien books on NOT.

Searched for covers and posted all day, even putting up a link on Facebook. Breakfast at 9 AM, wrote my KK&AP pages early, and lunch at 1 PM. Made tea, the first time for days. Went in at 3:30 PM to start supper (sausage, cabbage, and taters, displaced from Tuesday) then came back and ate at 5 PM. Rosary at 7:30 PM. Making new lists, breaking the Tolkien books into categories. Washed up at 8:20 PM. Got an extra sausage! Re-arranged the papers into the bridge drawers. Now 9:15 PM, and what I do now is up to me. Hopefully the tea won’t make me jazzed all night.

Went searching for my Tolkien posters and realized they weren’t where I thought they should be; behind the desk. They must be on the other side, behind the recliner and the shelf. Too late to undertake the quest tonight, but tomorrow … 10:20 PM right now, and I know this will haunt me. I did get a good look at the other posters, though, which had some old movie posters from Blockbuster (including Harry Potter), SNL, some music posters (Pink Floyd, for one), Don Quixote in his study, Sherlock Holmes Strand (from Yen’s friend). An interesting examination anyway, and I was able to neaten them up. Perry Mason on now.  Bed a little after midnight.

 

NOTES

Rather mechanical entries. I was falling impulsively into a rhythm, with little opportunity for contemplation. At one time I had about 200 items on my Amazon Wish List, which was whittled down over time by acquisitions and discards of stuff I realized wasn’t really necessary. I’m wheezy again now, so I guess it probably was something seasonal in the air; one can notice these patterns more easily with a Diary. It was quite a while before I catalogued all the magazines, just lately in fact. I still want to go through the ‘attic’ for cataloguing purposes, but I’m beginning to fear that will be a post-mortem project for somebody else. Everything else is pretty much organized, so much so that I only reluctantly disturb ‘the stacks.’ Contemplation of the Hoard without physical manipulation is one of the benefits of the Niche.

I regularly go through 'ponderings' of what my past self would say about the present Hoard; there is much that would merely puzzle, say, my middle school self; much that would amaze and intrigue my senior-year self; and even stuff that would astound the merely five-year-ago me.

I wish I had been better organized when I started the Niche. It would have kept me from some redundancies.

October 2019: That Time of Year

 

10/19/2019: Up at about 5 AM. Prayers, catechism, Bible. Wrote up to page 30 on BB2 [Bob’s Book 2]. Dressed, ate some ramen, and left for The Texas Cooler about 7:10 AM; got there and waited a bit while the lady finished filling the ice machine, then got a Powerball. Walked back (a little warm, as I'd worn my vest) and got back at the stroke of 8 AM. About 9 AM laid down on the couch and awoke at 11 AM. Caught up diary. Watched some Simpson Halloween. Ramen about 1 PM.

2:30 PM: soaked feet in pool. Head much licked by Rotts [Rottweilers]. 3:PM: Prayed Rosary. Watched some House.

In the evening, Andy brought me out the leftover chicken salad, some grapes, and bananas.

 
I watched some Ripping Yarns while I ate, and when I took the bowl in, I saw what I had rather suspected, that they had gone to Eckman's Toy and Comic show. Kameron had about six bags full of toys and Susan had at least 4 new cookie jars. I really didn't mind not going because 1) I had no money and 2) there hadn't been - and really isn't much anymore - stuff that I had wanted. And me legs are shit. So they could have told me what they were doing without any fear that I'd want to go along.

Looking at all the shows - Sherlock Holmes, Michael Palin stuff - from the 80's keeps reminding me of a world that was gone, a moderate world both conservative and progressive. The scales swing too wildly now.

Turned the AC on after having it off for a couple of days. Getting ready to sleep by 10 PM, I think.

 

10/20/2019: Up at 5:30 AM. Showered, dressed, straightened house. Prayers, catechism, Bible. 6:38 AM caught up diary. Ready to leave by 7 AM; it will be a rather dark walk, as the sun won't rise till about 7:30 AM.

So, church today seemed rather flat; Father Greg made a lot of mis-reads, as if he were distracted. Good thing that doesn't affect the efficacy of the Mass. Came home, made my last 2 ramen for breakfast (and a couple of bananas). Did nothing but putter around (read some Poe). At lunch finished off the other two bananas.

Watched an episode of Saints and Scoundrels (Kolbe v. Goebbels). In the evening I found I still had half a package of chocolate grahams that I had forgotten. To show how bored I am I actually watched the Fox animation block (The Simpson's Treehouse of Horror 30 - Episode 666. Sigh). Afterwards I found by scrabbling around I actually had a dollar worth of change (mostly pennies), so I could have bought some more ramen if I wanted to. Too late now.

I started reading my 2018 Diary and found to my dismay that about the last 1/3 of it was missing. Was able to recover it by going to my e-mail archives, where I had thankfully banked it.

 

10/21/2019: It is impressed on me how little of the year is left, and how soon it will be 2020. May we all see clearer then.

Woke up about 5:30. Wrote down Grizzly Bear and Terminator dream. Hear (I think) drips or rain outside. Now 6:30 AM. Must pray and write. End of Chapter 1 of BB2 in sight.

Wrote up to where Pa comes in. Looked out about 8:25 AM and saw that Susan was already gone, so went ahead and started wash, made chicken salad, made my morning ramen, ate it, then started broccoli salad. S and Kam came back about 9:45 AM; he had gone to the dentist. S left; I changed loads; K and I went out about 10:22 AM; I was way ahead of schedule. Then the bus doesn't get here until 11:03 AM. That's 40 MINUTES of my life I won't ever get back, most of it standing because the bench is too wet, in fact two of the seats have standing puddles. K a bundle of nerves. When I can finally go in and finish the salad my legs are a mess of twangling tendons. Finish up, change loads, go in to fold and listen to GGACP, and the connection gets knocked off in 3 minutes. I console myself that I am still ahead of schedule, as I usually don't make the broccoli salad before 1 PM anyway, and the wash is almost done. It's 11:55 AM; I just heard what I assume is the pool guy go through the gate.

Little before 4 PM went the usual schedule. Watched "The Devil and Daniel Webster" on TMC.

Afterwards about 7 PM finished BB2 Chapter One and sent it off to John. Went in to wash up and found that Andy hadn't been back yet and was in fact not expected until later. I said call me and I'd clean up, but it's almost midnight so I don't think that's gonna happen. Kam came in and we read riddles to each other for a bit, and I got the mini-pecan pie recipe from Amy as per Susan's request and sent it to her in an e-mail. And now I've suddenly remembered the Rosary and have to be sure I stay up long enough to do that.

 

10/22/2019: Got up about 8 AM. Got dressed, straightened up house. Prayed, catechism, Bible. Went in at 9 AM and got the stuff to make Kam bacon and eggs. Took him breakfast, then made my ramen. We went out about 10:20 AM (a little early because of yesterday) and waited till about 10:35 AM. There were a ton of monarch butterflies flying around. Went in about 1 PM to get lunch.

John called me; he congratulated me on the chapter, then reminded me that yesterday was the 13th anniversary of Mike's passing, and today was the 20th of Mom's. Now I understand the butterflies. He's going to bring me the pay tomorrow afternoon. Rosary. At 3 PM Kenny called, and we talked a while about the remembrances. Made supper and grassed and fed the pets; sausages, cabbage and taters. Marx Brothers movies on all day that I dipped in and out of. Connectivity for the computer very poor.

Watched "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" at 7 PM. Went in to wash up at 8 PM and found the back door screen mysteriously on the hook; no one claims to have done it. Made Kameron some TX Toast.

Notes

Father Greg had been doing rather poorly (strokes and falls) and has since retired. The anniversary of Mike's and Mom's passing is often marked by vast clouds of butterflies (and sometimes dragonflies). Perhaps it's just that time of year, but natural coincidences are often signs too, I oftensometimes think.

October 2019 Diary

 

10/2/2019: Tried to go in at 7:30 AM to make Kam bacon and eggs as he asked me as I thought he had to go to school early. Devotions. Went back at 9 AM and got the stuff and brought it out to cook. He left about 10:35 AM. Catechism. Nap. 2 PM leftover cabbage. Thoughts all morning about Jocasta story. Two characters: the lawyer who brings the children, and the main servant. Omniscient narrator. Supper pork chops and sauerkraut. Rosary. Wash dishes, and talk to Susan, who is packing for Kameron.

 

10/3/2019: Up about 6:30 AM. Devotions and catechism. Andy brings me some grapefruit and an elderly banana just as I'm stepping out from the shower. Go out and wait a little after 8 AM to say bon voyage to Kam [he went to Germany with Andy’s parents]; 8:20 AM the grandparents came to pick him up. They loaded up and I said my good travels and went in. At 9 AM went in and got leftover cabbage, taters, and pork chops and made into a stew with tomato sauce. Right now it’s about 10:30 AM.

 

10/4/2019: Instead of doing any work, I mostly napped. It started well enough, with prayers, catechism, AND Bible this morning. Then I went in at 9 AM and ate the leftover broccoli salad (quite a bit this time) and the chicken salad (a lot - do they even ever eat any?), then watched a lot of "Minty" videos on old 80's movies, then bloated off to sleep. At 2 PM I get up, feeling pains in my legs (am I headed into the October trifecta?), go in, and grass dogs early - they were pretty loud. Came in and started DW shows. Also turned on the AC this late. Feeding, grassing at 4 PM. Rosary at 4:30 PM. No dishes or cleaning; I went to bed very early.

Sent John: I am sad to report that I didn't get very far on my writing this week. Various unusual circumstances, both good and bad, knocked me off my routine and set me atilt. It torments me, and fills me with guilt, and makes me think of how I am wasting my limited time. The solution, of course, is to simply apply myself, but the mechanism seems unusually tetchy right now. I am, perhaps, relying too much on an autumnal boost; also, I am diverted by an idea for a new short story based on a very old dream [Aunt Jocasta], that would fit in very well with the month. I came up with an unusual twist for the old idea, and it rises up like a ghost in front of BB2. Perhaps I should get it out of the way first, while it's hot. All I wants to do is binge on Netflix (I'm in the middle of "The Good Place", a Bangsian fantasy), watch YouTube reviews of 80's movies and novelty songs, and sip tea. But the night is young.

His reply: There is an odd antsy-ness in the air- I suppose mostly it is the expectation of fall weather- but also in the larger world- this impeachment business has drawn a very stark picture of our bifurcated society- one side seems to be gloating that they have their man red-handed,  and as good as gone, the other gloats that their opponents have finally totally overplayed their hand, and are as good finished- and who the eff really knows what is going on. It's like an enormous rubber band that's been pulled to its extreme on both sides, and all we can do is watch and wait to see how it's going to snap. [It hasn’t changed much, has it?] Alas...I think if you have a hot idea you should pursue it, even if it was unplanned for. Discipline is of course the key to bringing things to conclusion, but inspiration brings things out of nothing, and that is a mighty fine gift that can't be taken for granted or put off.  Follow the fire, my boy!

 

10/5/2019: Woke up about 3 AM and wrote down a dream, checked my e-mail, played WWF, then fixed the first paragraph of AJ (Aunt Jocasta) [published elsewhere on this blog] so that I should be able to pick it up when I want to. Prayers, catechism, Bible. Ready to lay down a while now.  

Up again at 7 AM, and between shows of celebrities who died young and making breakfast, managed to get up to page 4, and the appearance of Aunt Jocasta. It is now almost 11 AM, and I think I might nap again.

About 2 PM I had lunch. About 4 PM Andy brought me out 4 bananas and the rest of the oatmeal cookies. At 9 PM said the Rosary, with a decade for Kameron's safety.

 

10/6/2019: Woke up again at about 2:30 AM, wrote down dream, went on a quest for the old blue bat with a rubbery lip; never found him, but found many other amazing "vending machine" and "rack toy" treasures. Went back to sleep about 4 AM, with my right leg entering, as it seems, a new level of painumbness.

Woke up about 6:30 AM, got ready for church despite leg and left at 7 AM. They were asking for help with Jamaica for the second offering, but I didn't even have anything for the first. The bells seem fine now. Walked home, saw Gloria and Ginger/or Mary Anne(?). Had 2 bananas and the last Pumpkin Delight for breakfast. Sic Transit Gloria Mundi.

I don't envy J. K. Rowling; she has to compete against J. K. Rowling.

At 11:30 AM I went in and got 2 ramen, cooked them, napped about an hour, then ate. About 2 PM I went out and swept the back and kitchen porches, carelessly rubbing a layer of skin off my left thumb. More annoying than painful; you get that squeaky new skin. They had the first 2 Hobbit movies on today. I tried to watch, but I couldn't take it very long.

Rest of the day? Not much. Tried to keep my hunger at bay with tea and peppermints. Unboxed the Peanuts toys. Tried to read Proust. Wrote a little on AJ.

 

10/7/2019: Up pretty early; about 5 AM. Prayers, Bible, Catechism. A little before 8 AM Andy brings me a couple of huge tacos: Chorizo eggs, beans, and I think cream cheese. I write on and off all day. At 9 AM start wash, and have the windows open, as it is a beautiful, mild, windy day.  Finish the wash about 1 PM. Lunch, a turkey and cheese sandwich and a ramen. Make broccoli salad. At 4 PM grass dogs, feed cats, start supper: salmon rolls and parmesan couscous. Eat couscous for my own supper, as well as salad. Watch DW shows.

Went in at 8 PM to wash up and was given a couple of bean and sausage breakfast tacos as well as the rest of the couscous. Susan told me about their Halloween garage sale this Saturday; I might throw in a few items. Rosary at 9 PM. Reached the 10th page of "Aunt Jocasta".

 

10/8/2019: No writing today. All things went per usual. Weather nicely cool; didn't need AC until 2 PM. Susan worked on her Halloween garage sale all evening. There was a bit of tension when a cruise ship was damaged on the Danube, but it wasn't Kameron's, which was a relief. S&A gave me left over oatmeal cookies.

 

10/9/2019: Woke up from dreams about 7 AM obsessed (again) with ideas about re-writing the past: what I should do, what special conditions and abilities I would want. Washed dishes, prayed, catechism, read Bible. Caught up diary. Now 8 AM.

Got a spreadsheet from Kris Jerome; it shows a profit of $5.65 on the 3 e-books sold. No word about the money on the 22 physical copies yet. Checked on my Amazon page and found a second review, a 5 star review, no less! Hope it's sincere. Reads: (Lenny the Pep) I loved it! Definition of a page turner! I could not put it down, 5 stars for sure! [That's a lot of !!!. I love it! - BB]

Went in and picked up the witch wind-excluder and repaired her boot and cloak for Susan. It's now 11 AM, weather a little sultry, and I feel ready for another nap.

Went in at 1 PM and baked jalapeno cornbread, and had cabbage and taters for lunch. Went in at 4 PM and made crab chowder. Rosary at 7 PM, then at 8 PM went in to wash up. Susan gave me a sheet, and we talked a bit.

 

10/10/2019: Leftover chowder for supper. Prayers, Catechism, Bible, Rosary. Wrote up to page 14 of AJ. Gave Susan the "orc sword" for garage sale. Going to library sale with J&A tomorrow at 8:30 AM.

 

10/11/2019: Got up about 6:30 AM. When I turned off the AC heard wind and a bit of rain. Showered, dressed, prayed, read catechism and Bible. Now 7:30 AM, and I await going with J&A, and wonder about mud, dogs, and rain when I leave. Going into sale without hopes or expectations, but ready for good surprises.

Went and sat on the porch and nice and cold, very windy, sky dark grey with clouds. They appeared at 8:30 AM and off we went to New Braunfels. We had very good conversation on the way up. Got there and started the hunt. I found some good books, including: Medieval English Verse; 82 Charing Cross Road; After the Victorians; Brewer's Phrase and Fable for the 20th Century; America in Legend; and at long last a hardback of The Once and Future King. Afterwards we ate at IHOP, where I had an omelet and 3 pancakes. We headed back, and I got home a little before 1 PM. Immediately opened the house to catch the winds, and read the Charing Cross book. Laid down a bit, fed and grassed pets at 4 PM. Later went in at 6 PM, said hi to Kaitlyn, and got chicken and broccoli salads for supper. Rosary a little after 8 PM. No AC all day! Now working on the After the Victorians book.

 

10/12/2019: The day of Susan's Halloween garage sale and (what I was even less involved in) the library 'creators' event. Looked out about 7 AM and they were already gone. The Rotts had torn up one of the red pillows on the back porch bench. In a little bit I cleaned that up, and gradually I swept the kitchen porch (watching out for my blister scar). Had breakfast, and crab chowder for lunch (the cornbread was already bad; had to throw that out; cook it longer next time), and for supper an orange. Read the AV book all day. Prayers, catechism, Bible in the morning, and Rosary about 8 PM. Finally saw Kameron at about 11:20 AM; went to hug him but he stopped me as he has a cold. Got him some Sprite and let the dogs out and fed the cats. About 4 PM Gloria brought me a jacket and some more shirts, which was sweet but a little problematic for me, as I don't have much room and not sure how they'll fit. About 5:30 PM let the dogs out again, and the little raccoon with the bare tail was already out and about and ready to eat. S&A and Kaitlyn came back about 8 PM, I guess, but never checked in with me, as I imagine they were busy for a while putting stuff up. Went to bed reading, and never had the AC on all day, though it did clear and warm up as time passed.

 

10/13/2019: Up about 5 AM; laid a while then decided to catch up dream journal and diary. Did so, and now time to get moving, I guess. Prayers, Bible, and Catechism. Left for church at 7 AM, catechists there today. Home. Andy brings me Pumpkin Delights [it's that season again!] and bananas, AND $20 from the garage sale. Went to FD about 12:30 PM and got 3 cans of Pringles for $3 and some shrimp ramen. Spent all day eating, reading, and glancing at YT. 8 PM Kameron calls and says no school tomorrow (Columbus Day). Spent time going through the shirts from Gloria.

 

10/14/2019: Up about 7 AM. Got dressed. Andy comes and tells me to make chicken salad again, and I joke that is he sure? Will they eat it this week at last?  Started wash and went in to salad and make my ramen. The shop cat is here; Kameron says because work is too hot, but I get the feeling that it's on its way out. Listening to GGACP.

Today feels very ... well, sehnsucht-y. Maybe having the windows open and hearing all the migrating birds calling and quarreling. And trains over the weekend.  I'm finding it hard to watch anything at all or read anything fantasy (I'm reading After the Victorians, but it's not a feeding reading, if you know what I mean) much less write anything. They take the cat Fluffy to be put to sleep.

Between 12:45 PM and 2 PM I make broccoli salad, interrupted when Kameron asks me to grass the chis. At 2 PM make lunch. Then Fluffy's bag is on the back porch; take to my bathroom. At 4 PM feed cats and make supper (fish rolls and couscous). About 5:40 PM Susan comes around with guy to look at window. Finish prayers, then catechism and Bible. The pile of shirts on the bins, swaddled in white plastic, make that side of the room look lighter, and I keep thinking the kitchen light is on. Andy comes to get Fluffy’s body about 8 PM I go in and clean up. Read, rosary, slump to sleep.